Foster Parent of the Year says experience is rewarding

Fostering children is an extremely rewarding experience for Nancy Arnold, who was named Foster Parent of the Year earlier this week. The award was a surprise, but she missed the event as she and her 10-year-old son Alex were returning from an “awesome Panama Cruise.”

Arnold tries always to attend the banquet, but this was the only time the 14-day cruise to the Panama Canal and Costa Rica was planned this summer.

“I appreciate their confidence in the differences I make in kids’ lives,” Arnold said.

Arnold was director at the John J. Pershing Veterans Administration Medical Center and previously had worked as a nurse at Doctors Regional Medical Center. She planned to foster children when she retired.

“I always had a love for kids and said I wanted six boys when I grew up,” Arnold said. “A lady from our church who was fostering” encouraged her to take the classes.

“I started a little early taking foster care children,” she said. Although her job with the VA required a lot of travel, her mother went along on her work trips to help care for the children.

With her medical background, she’s qualified to work with children who have medical or behavioral problems. “A lot of kids have behavioral problems,” she said.

“I have had 50 different placements ranging from a few weeks up to two years is the longest,” she said. With providing respite care for other foster parents, Arnold has had a total of “102 different kids in my home a few days or two weeks. A lot of new faces do come and go.”

Arnold tries to “make a difference in working with families and tries to help them make a difference for those kids,” she said. Admitting there may be a few “hiccups along the way, seeing a child healthy and happy is rewarding.”

Arnold’s home is licensed for five children unless they are a sibling group and she may have up to seven at a time.

Arnold’s four-bedroom home was reasonably sized but after retiring in 2009, she felt strongly about needing more space.

“I went out, looked and added to the house,” she said. “I built a basement, library, a large, large extra bedroom and toy room.”

Calling it a big building program, she said, the house is located in the country in the woods and the youngsters have a tree house. Arnold feel the children need their own space and a variety of things to do to help them adjust.

She was a foster mom to Alex and when he was adoptable she and her large family, who were the only family Alex knew, said, “adopt.” None of the family wanted to break that bonding, she said.

“Alex is an awesome little boy,” the proud mother said. Her older son is 46.

When they are bringing new foster children into their home, Arnold explained, Alex will approach them sharing, “my name is Alex and you are coming to our home” and he’ll pick up their suitcase.” Arnold and Alex know it is hard for the children, “They are just so scared.”

Arnold stressed foster parents must plan for reunification while loving the children.

“One of the things you start out planning is for reunification,” Arnold said. “That does not mean you don’t love them and make a difference in their lives. They are not your permanent children but the whole time you love them just like they are your own. You love and you let go.”

While she’s almost 76, Arnold, who is very active, said, “God has blessed me with good health. I plan to care for the kids as long as I can.”

Returning from the cruise and winning the award are just the first activities for Arnold and Alex this summer. “We have a whole bunch of plans,” she said.

Included on the list are trips to Branson, Turpentine Creek Wildlife Refuge and another cruise. Whoever is placed in the Arnold home will be welcomed with two pairs of open arms. “They just go with us,” Arnold said. If their parents don’t allow them to go on the cruise, they go into respite care until they return.

“Where I go they go,” she added. “We have lots of fun plans.”