‘He who walks with the wise grows wise’

This year, 2019, has definitely been a year of reflection for me.

Truncone

It has been a year of regrouping. I am at a place in my life where I am very content. I am happily married.

My kids are transitioning towards adulthood. I am learning the balance of when to be a heavy influence in their lives and at other times watching the decisions that they make without much guidance from myself. Most of those times, I find myself rejoicing in their choices they have made.

I am the Pastor of a healthy church that is on the grow. Every service is a celebration of Jesus Christ and a celebration of abundant life in Him, the one who has made us and has saved us.

My range of influence has grown significantly over the past two years. More people want my council, my opinion or my advice more than any other time in my life. I have expressed in the past few months that I have worked hard to manage my life and have a healthy balance to it.

I recently had a dear friend who passed away suddenly. He was a very good friend and several years ago he would be identified as a father-figure in my life. I had not been real close to him over the past 12 years of my life. Not because our relationship was strained but rather the whirlwind of life and activity had us on different paths.

About three years ago I was invited to a 95th anniversary of one of the churches I served as a youth pastor. It was there I reconnected again with my friend and his wife. Last summer, I reconnected with him again as I went back to preach a revival at that church. He was there in every service. We were able to share some meals together during that time.

His untimely passing has taught me something very important, I did not get to this place in my life on my own.

Alongside my bride and I, through the years, has been many incredible people who have influenced us along the way. They have invested something in us that is priceless and that is their love and friendship. My parents and my wife’s parents have been an incredible support over the years.

However, there are several others that have invested in us. I have had the honor and privilege to serve underneath four incredible pastors through our ministry. Three of the four have preached in my church and I keep in touch with them. The other Pastor has had a struggle with his health and is up in years. I must make time to spend some time with him and his precious wife.

In the four churches of those four pastors I served under, were dear people who have been a part of this incredible journey.

I am not half the servant of Christ I am without their influence in my life. I recently read a story of a youth pastor who just completed service in his first church after just 10 months of service. He has taken a job outside of ministry trying to regroup before he takes another ministry assignment.

He asked this question, “What must I do to grow and become more disciplined to really have a successful youth ministry?”

My answer to that is this; You must influence people who influence others. Which means he is not called just to build relationships with students. He is called to serve a Pastor’s vision and build relationships with the adults of that congregation.

I have made that statement before and have had younger ministers say, “My job is to reach the youth and I do not have time to build relationships with the adults of the congregation.”

Well, that is fine, you will build relationships with students. You may even end up building a large youth ministry, but if you are not building relationships with the adults and the Pastor and his bride in that congregation keep the number to the moving van on your cell phone speed dial or keep it on your refrigerator because you will be calling that number often.

Heidi and I have been the lead pastors at First Assembly of God in Van Buren going on nine years.

We accepted this position after 20 years of youth ministry in four main churches.

During that time, we also reopened a church that had been closed. Eighteen years later that church is thriving today. We also were part of a Church Plant in the city that has become well established. None of those long-term positions happen without building relationships with people who were not in our ministry portfolio or part of our age group.

One of the secrets of our longevity here in Van Buren has been the reverse of relationship building that we used in the churches we served as staff pastors. Even though we are senior pastors we continued to build relationships and do life with teenagers even though we had youth pastors.

The reason is when you Pastor with longevity in mind, you will build relationships with students who in 10 years most likely won’t be students anymore. They will have spouses, careers, their own homes and probably children. Everything may have changed in their life, yet a few things have remained the same for our students who have been through that transition in Van Buren, there has been a constant.

We are still there and that love and dedication brings a sense of security. Little by little we are seeing those we invested in returning in their adulthood. One of those students who is now an adult and married I will have the honor of baptizing in water in about two weeks. God is so good!

None of the things that I am writing about happen without God leading us and it does not happen without the people He placed around us and spoke into us.

No matter your profession or your walk of life, Proverbs 13:20 is like gold for you, “He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.” Furthermore, do not forget about the friend you have in Jesus.

Proverbs 18:24, “One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” I am so thankful for that friend. Take time to connect and time to say thank you to those who have invested in your life.

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Dave Truncone and his wife, Heidi, have been married 26 years. They have two daughters, Hannah, 20, and Abigail, 16. They have lived in Van Buren for eight years.