If the community doesn’t give those in the foster care system the “tools to succeed, we, as a society, will suffer,” said Tobey Wilkerson of southwest Missouri.
Wilkerson experienced foster care after the age of 7. She was bounced between her mother and various foster homes for several years until she cycled out of the system unprepared to start a life on her own.
She knows firsthand how the new program Foster Youth Transitions would have helped her and can help others.
Wilkerson and Mary Haldeman share information about pitfalls in the foster care system and ways the community and business people may help those struggling in today’s world.
Haldeman is program director of the Southeast Missouri branch office of FosterAdopt Connect in Poplar Bluff.
Wilkerson talks about being a foster child floating around and unprepared for life’s struggles. She gives an example of having no experience renting an apartment plus having no cosigners or references.
Often former foster children get a job but never show up because they are told to wear a certain style of shoe or a specific outfit. They don’t have parents to teach them how to handle the system or answer their questions about the new job. Many will not ask their future employer.
For many, this pattern follows when they cycle out of the system often unprepared to start a life on their own. After aging out when she turned 18, Wilkerson was homeless, experimented with drugs and engaged in risky behaviors — a far cry from her life today.
Today, Wilkerson is a success story by any standards. She leads a full, busy life as a wife, mother, foster mom, small business owner and rescue pet parent. Her accomplishments are especially impressive when considering she grew up in and out of the foster care system.
She and her husband are raising two adopted children and regularly take in foster kids from large biological families — sometimes seven of them at a time. They also own and operate a flooring business in southwest Missouri, where they often employ young adults who age out of foster care. Wilkerson believes it’s their responsibility to say “yes” to current and former foster youth whenever possible, just like the manager of a small-town McDonald’s did for her when she was in high school. She worked hard at the job he gave her and credits him with changing her life.
Wilkerson challenges others to intervene and help youngsters’ lives become a win, win situation where they choose jobs over drugs, employment over homelessness and/or jail time. Being on this program can lend that helping hand. Wilkerson explained Missouri businesses face worker shortages. Young adults who have aged out of foster care could help fill this gap — but they need assistance finding jobs and performing effectively in the workplace.
According to provided information, in Missouri there are 4,362 foster care children, or 23%, age 14 years old or older. These teens need help in learning how to maintain valuable employment, Haldeman said.
“I do know this Foster Youth Transitions will be somewhat of an extension of the CCYP (Community Connections Youth Project), which is already active and successful in some of FosterAdopt Connect offices,” Haldeman said. “Simply having the case manager, mentor-and-advocate-type professional in their corner, at their beck and call is a huge advantage to the foster youth. Having that support can make the difference between living on the street and becoming involved in drugs and crime versus having meaningful employment, developing healthy relationships and growing as an individual.”
Haldeman’s office is located at 2198 N. Westwood Blvd., near the Children’s Division. The program is known best in SEMO as Sammy’s Window. If anyone is interested in hosting a drive for FosterAdopt Connect or having a tour email her at maryh@fosteradopt.org. She would love to show the community the work they do.
FosterAdopt Connect, a nonprofit with an office in Poplar Bluff, is developing a program that not only would connect these young adults with businesses with open positions, but also would partner with businesses to help them address the unique needs of former foster youth in the workplace. The program is designed to ensure that any aged-out foster youth companies bring on board are productive hires.
For additional information about the Fostering Youth Transitions program call Sarah Jefferies at 1-816-350-0215 extension 383, or email sarahj@fosteradopt.org .