‘Heartbreaking,’ adults experience a day in the life of a foster child

Approximately 300 children are in foster care in Butler and Ripley counties, according to officials, and more than 443,000 children nationwide.

On a recent overcast day in November, 35 community members and business leaders boarded a school bus to participate in a foster care system simulation event sponsored by FosterAdopt Connect. The event is part of a nationwide program called, “Journey Home,” taking place in cities all over the country.

FosterAdopt Connect is a comprehensive support and advocacy center in Poplar Bluff for abused and neglected children and the families caring for them.

The half day bus tour gave attendees a day-in-the-life look into what it means to be a foster child. Each participating adult was assigned an individual child’s identity based on stories of real children. At the end of the event, attendees learned the outcomes of the children whose identities they were assigned.

During the tour, participants experienced what a foster child would face; from getting 10 minutes and a trash bag to pack up belongings to interacting with health care workers, police officers, child protection agencies and courts.

Guests were also taken to a variety of workshop sessions throughout the tour to hear from speakers representing multiple child welfare organizations, the judicial system and the medical community.

Mary Haldeman, program director of FosterAdopt Connect, said the importance of the speakers was to “bring home the trauma and confusion that abused and neglected children face in their fostering experiences.”

She noted the last workshop of the day given by former foster child Nate Newman of Poplar Bluff was extremely poignant. He shared his impactful story of what it was like navigating the child welfare system as a child, the traumas he endured and the long lasting effects of child abuse and neglect.

Sharing his story was a “challenge” said Newman, and the first time he spoke about his experiences publicly.

“If it will help a child, that’s what’s important,” Newman said of his willingness to participate.

Newman, a sales manager at Hefner Furniture, moved many attendees to tears during his talk, said Haldeman.

Poplar Bluff Greater Area Chamber of Commerce President Steve Halter said if you heard Newman’s story and “didn’t have a lump in your throat or a tear in your eye, you are not a human being.” He was “so glad” he attended and noted what a tremendous “cross section” of people represented our community at the event.

Participant Jerrica Fox, executive director of Downtown Poplar Bluff, said she found Newman’s personal testimony “heartbreaking,” but was “very thankful to take part” in the simulation. She believes our community is “privileged” to have such great resources like FosterAdopt Connect and Great Circle in its midst.

Fox said her hope is to see more “positive improvements” and change in the child welfare system in the community for the future.

“It was such an eye-opening experience to witness” the struggles of children passing through the foster care system, she said. Through the event, Fox said she learned “what an impact” the community can have on the foster system and its children. Everyone can make a difference, Fox said.

Other attendees participating in the tour included Kyle Aubuchon from Governor Mike Parson’s office; Kevin Ellis from John J. Pershing VA Medical Center; Pastor Ron Webb of Mt. Calvary Church; Dave Elledge of Sleep in Heavenly Peace; Jacob Hogg of Saint Francis Physician’s Park Medical Clinic; Judith Nettles of CASA; Mark Stidham, city of Dexter administrator; Raymond Webb of Walmart; and Margie Redmond of Redmond Properties.

For more information on FosterAdopt Connect go online to www.fosteradopt.org or call 573-552-4295.